My butt takes over the game

The level of my sexual tension has always been quite high. Especially, when something seemingly kinky, new, or forbidden came to my mind. I do not remember the first moment when I thought of using my butt to please myself. But I have quite early memories from my teenage years when I used some hand cream as lube and slid some Sharpies into my butthole. The more the better. I know it does not necessarily sound very sexy but I had no other tools. I didn't wonder about having sex with guys, nothing at all like this, but I enjoyed experimenting on my body.

I was very much into girls during high school, and it caused a lot of frustration, I always wanted to try sex with girls, although - as an introvert - I never let myself ask out someone. The more I was into someone the less I was able to speak. I had a girlfriend before high school then there was a longer break. In the last year of high school, I met one of my schoolmates at a party and we immediately started having feelings. She was sexy, easy-going, and funny. Of course, we were both too shy and callow. I think he was more experienced with sex, I'd only had one girl before her and I do not consider it even a proper sex. Anyway, we started dating, and having a lot of sex, mainly at her place but sometimes even in hidden places within the school. I enjoyed it very much, it was a long relationship, more than two years. It might have never been love, but we'd enjoyed each other's company for some time. We learned a lot from this relationship, but we never dove too deep into our sexuality, we don't really know how to talk about it, what else can we do. But sex obviously became an important part of my life.

With my next girlfriend, sex was apparently a crucial bond. It was a kind of friends-with-benefits relationship in the beginning but it lasted way longer and became more serious, although it was still a kind of adolescent relationship. But when she started fantasizing about having sex with a girl, we whispered imaginary ideas about having a threesome with such a girl. During these conversations, having a threesome with a guy also came to my mind. I'm not sure whether we discussed it or it remained only in my mind, but the latter is undeniable.

Around that time, I started using sex chat platforms. In the beginning, I only focused on women but, slowly, I realized that we had a lot in common with guys. There were many gays and bisexuals on those chat websites, and they were pretty open-minded. I was not a fast-track but steadily I realized that I wanted to try enjoying a cock. Thus, it led to an encounter with a bisexual guy who I sucked first time in my life. I also fucked him, but it did not take too much time to realize that I enjoy it more the other way around: I wanted to feel the cock not only in my mouth but also in my butt.

I started playing with my hole again. This time I used the good old methods: carrots, cucumbers, or some smaller yellow peppers were always handy tools to discover new boundaries. Later, I made a decision to buy proper tools and eventually, I ended up buying a proper vibrating dildo that looked almost like a real 17-cm dick. I also purchased some additional toys, a plug, and a vibrating prostate massager. From chat conversations and internet searches, I also learned how to do the enema and clean myself properly. It felt so good. Finally, this whole thing wasn't a dirty something anymore. I didn't have to feel ashamed because of the mistakes, I was able to play on my couch and just enjoy my new playthings.

It was easy to get used to the feeling of having these tools inside me, so I was determined to take a chance on a real guy. Well, to be completely honest, I was not sure when to do it and with whom. Of course, I wanted it but it was a great struggle. Eventually, I ended up with a guy who I also paid some money for, he was an escort. It wasn't a great sum of money, and we also failed to have proper sex. Obviously. I think I was too tight and the situation wasn't calming enough to loosen my butt. And honestly, he was not sexy enough and probably, he was not as experienced as he claimed.

It didn't dampen my spirits though. I struggled to find other guys, and then I found a bi guy who had a girlfriend. I also had a girlfriend at that time, so we were in the same shoes, and it helped a lot. We had been chatting for a while when finally we met at his place. He had a thick cock which I immediately fell in love with. We both sucked each other, then I asked him if he wanted to fuck me. He nodded and said yes. So I dropped to all fours before him. I asked for some lube, and I put some on my butt then I gently opened my asshole with two fingers. In the meantime, he was putting on a condom. My ass pointed skyward, directly in front of him. My hole was getting loosened more and more, and it was smooth and spotless. I remember the moment he slid in. Wow, it was amazing. His thick cock completely opened my hole, and I was over the moon. It took a few moments to get used to the situation, and then he started pounding into me in a slow but steady rhythm. The more I got used to it, the more I started moving. I pushed my ass to his body, so his penis went deeper and deeper with a continuously repeating slapping sound. I was fucked. I mean literally. This is what I wanted at that time. He fucked me harder and harder, we took our time. But it didn't take too much to get closer to the end. I asked him to do as hard as he was able. I don't exactly remember how we finished it. These details somehow evaporate. Who knows, maybe these details are not that important. And it's true, the important part is that I was fucked, that I was used by a top and finally, I became a true bottom. It felt so good, better than I had thought.

Ever since, this is what I'm chasing in sex with guys. Being a bottom, being used, being under a massive cock. I always want to know that my butt is spotless, clean, and pussy-like, so they can use it. Or I can ride their cock. Whatever comes, I enjoy it. But something is constant: my enthusiasm towards thick cocks. Length never makes me that interested., but a thick one... or maybe two normal-sized cocks. OK, I should hold my horses for now...